The “I Have Something to Say” series continues! Today we are hearing from Kristin:
Being a stay-at-home mom was something that I never knew I wanted. It was something that had never crossed my mind when I was in college or even after I had gotten married to my husband.
We lived in Hawaii, where my husband was stationed, for a little over three years. We were married for a year when we became pregnant with our first child – a beautiful, healthy baby girl! She was everything and more than I could have ever imagined. She was perfect. A short three months after her birth we were relocated to Virginia, where we reside now, in our first home that we bought together.
Once we were settled in, I started looking for both a job for myself and a daycare for my daughter. I found the perfect job and perfect daycare, or so I thought. My daughter was in daycare for roughly eight months when we pulled her out. We decided she would be better off with me and that I would now become a SAHM. I would still work on occasion but for all intents and purposes I would be a SAHM.
I loved it and couldn’t have been happier! I loved waking up to my beautiful daughter every morning and cooking her breakfast and being able to watch her grow right before my eyes. I knew we had made the perfect decision for our family. A couple of months passed by and I found myself feeling empty and getting frustrated easily at the little things and everyday life. I couldn’t understand why. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. I had what I never knew I wanted; I had a good life, an amazing husband, a beautiful home and so much more but something was missing.
I soon came to realize what was missing was me. I had gotten lost in the mix of becoming someone’s wife, a military wife at that, and someone’s mom. I was so many other things in between that I never realized until I was at my breaking point. I was also a wife, a mom (sometimes dad), a maid, a cook, a teacher, a dog walker, a gardener, a handyman, a support system and so much more. I was all these things but I wasn’t being me and I wasn’t asking for help. I thought if I asked for help it would make me feel needy. Now that I was a SAHM and not working that I was supposed to be super woman and be able to do it all.
I started to think that maybe I had made a mistake in staying home and maybe I wasn’t cut out for it. This is and was far from the truth and I soon came to realize that I had the most important job in the world. I was blessed with the job of raising this tiny human and having her call me mommy. Even though I did not receive a paycheck, I received so much more in return. I received daily kisses, snuggles, an abundance of hugs, games of chase and hide and go seek; all accompanied with giggles and laughter. This was my paycheck and one I will gladly take any day of the week.
With accepting my new life I knew that I still had to dig deep and find myself again. That is when I realized I had let go of the one thing I loved most in this world, fitness. I had let go of something I held so dear to make room for everything else. What I didn’t realize is that when you let go of who you are everything else falls apart. Keeping yourself as the main character is more important than anyone will ever know. Everything else will still go on as planned but if the main character disappears then the whole story can fall apart.
I also came to the conclusion that even super woman needs to ask for help and be vulnerable. It’s a part of life and everyone goes through it. Going through life carrying all the weight of, well life, isn’t any fun. Passing that weight off to someone might just be one of the best things you will ever do. It will feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders!
To sum up everything, I am pursuing my other joy in life and setting fitness goals for myself and others. I am being the best mom, wife and any other character thrown at me that I can. I am loving life and living it to the best of my abilities and that is all anyone can ever ask for.
Kristin and her husband, Logan, are both from North Carolina and are now living in Virginia. They have a beautiful daughter and 3 rambunctious fur-babies (1 cat and 2 dogs). They all will be transferring in December to a new location with the US Navy. Kristin is currently loving life as a SAHM and is living out her fitness goals by being a beach body coach. They plan on one day going back to Hawaii for a very long vacation!
You can follow along with Kristin on Facebook